Asexuality is a lack of sexual attraction, and an asexual is therefore a person who does not experience sexual attraction. The asexual, or "Ace" label is one that is misunderstood, and frequently used incorrectly. Asexuality has a variety of misconceptions floating around it, all of which need to be dispelled. For one thing: asexual and aromatic are two completely different things. An aromantic is a person who does not feel romantic attraction; this person will most likely never fall in love, never have a significant other, and will generally be perfectly content on their own. I say generally because romanticism, like sexuality, is always a spectrum. There are aromantic asexuals, and there are romantic asexuals who generally attach a gender-prefix such as "hetero-romantic asexual". Asexuality simply means that the person does not experience sexual attraction, there are many asexuals who want romantic relationships, physical relationships, who like to hug, and cuddle, and are just like everyone else, minus the sex.
The asexual label is high stigmatized, even in the LGBTQ+ community, which is supposed to be a safe space for all who do not fit into the heteronormative box which has always been seen as the only place where people "should" be. An LGBTQ+ persons have a variety of reasons for thinking that asexuals shouldn't be included in the LGBTQ+ community, including that asexuals face no oppression and that asexuality is a choice instead of a sexual identity and is therefore different from the rest of the identities that are always represented. Gay activist Dan Savage, who is known for being a bit of jerk, openly mocked the ace community in the documentary (A)Sexual by calling asexuality a preference, and ridiculing asexuals who marched in Pride parades, saying that "you have the asexuals marching for the right to not do anything. Which is hilarious. Like, you didn’t need to march for that right. You just need to stay home, not do anything." What the rest of the LGBTQ+ community doesn't seem to realize is that asexuals do in fact have something to fight for, and that they face the same discrimination that any non-heteronormative person faces. Because as much as we say sex is bad and you shouldn't be having it, if you say that you just don't want it, suddenly you're some sort of freak.
While there isn't a lot of outwards hate towards asexuals in the media, this is most likely because no one has ever heard of the invisible 1% of people who lack the ability to feel sexual attraction. However after a person has come out as asexual they are often subject to ridicule, acephobia, and occasionally even corrective rape. All of these are dangerous, but the latter especially so, an an ace person will often believe that they deserved it, because the person was only trying to help them. The verbal and emotional abuse to asexuals can include: claiming their sexuality is a choice, claiming their sexuality is a phase, claiming their sexuality is not a real thing, claiming that they are just being a prude, claiming that they just haven't met the right guy/girl yet, or claiming that they are a straight person who is just trying to be a "Special Snowflake."
So what does any of this have to do with gender? During my AP English class we were going through a "complete" list of gender terms which was made by a social justice activist who travels the country talking to kids about gender identity and oppression. And yet he knew a flawed, barely researched definition of asexuality, that, when given to my class, was mocked during the rest of the school day and was consistently used incorrectly. How can we trust a man to educate our youth on their gender identity and treating others' gender identity with respect when he doesn't even have a full grasp on the basics of all the sexualities, which play a very large and very influential role in many non-binary gender persons lives.
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