Not All Men

Not all men are like that

But her boyfriend was, keeping her locked inside, away from the ones who could have saved her

Not all men are like that, they protest

But the man who manipulated her into a complicit, submissive shadow was

Not all men are like that, the chant continues

It beats like she imagines her heart did when he was enraged and it was all she could do to pray that he was the same man everyone else saw, and that she would see daylight again

Not all men are like that, they plead to ears that have heard it all before

But the the boyfriend who left scars who can’t be seen was

"NOT ALL MEN ARE LIKE THAT" it’s a scream, a desperate attempt to show girls that they aren’t monsters, they aren’t him

But the boyfriend who “just held on too tight” was

"That’s not us!" They yell, stepping forward with hands outstretched

The girl steps back.

And they realize, it may not be them.

But they have the potential.

"Not all men, but him" she says, leaving a bible behind.

Inside is a picture with the words “Kay and Pastor John, First Anniversary”

10 Reasons to Get Another Dog

When Dewey and I went to dog park last Sunday I expected it to be like every other trip we make to the elite human hangout that happens to double as a place where you can let your dog run loose.  I knew what would happen: Dew would be overwhelmed by the other dogs, be glued to my leg, would watch the other four-leggers interact from the sidelines, and would only venture from big sis's side to visit the people sitting in lawn chairs, whom he thinks are there as "petting stations."  I hadn't known that they were having a benefit for the League for Animal Welfare, the shelter my family got that scraggly mutt from, and would have adoptable puppies in the park.

Surprisingly, a little hound named Biddy brought my old grumposaurus out of his shell.  The three-month old Brindle had puppy-soft fur and something about her that pulled Dewey out of his usual fear of other dogs.  We were both instantly in love.  Dewey, who usually interacts with a dog or group of dogs for a few minutes at the most before retreating to his more human companions was enamored with the little one who had chosen him over all of the others, and the pair returned to each other throughout their hour and a half at the park.  In fact when it was time to head for home the two both attempted to head towards Biddy's car.

So how does this expand farther than just the fact that I, a lowly blogger, am clearly head over paws in love with the sweetest puppy on earth? (Besides my darling Dew-baby of course!) Well, there is the small problem of my mother saying she will never get another animal after all the problems we had with our cat, Duck, and the fact that my cat Dexter is just a generally horrid old man.  He's big, he's old, he's creaky, he's stinky, he's not afraid to use physical violence, he's just generally a terror to have around the house.  So convincing her to save Biddy from the horrors of living in a small cage at a shelter will be a chore.  The first time I talked her into getting a dog I made a thirty slide power point presentation in which I outlined how I would take care of him and she would never have to do anything.  Now we've had a dog for five years and it won't be nearly as easy.  Because she knows that I'm not nearly as responsible as I should be, and that I complain about walking the dog, a lot.  However, to help all of those out there who want another dog here are some reasons that you can compile into a powerpoint presentation and hopefully then take your parents on a "we're just looking" trip and end up coming home with a puppy.  (Do you actually read these DH or have you given up on me by this point?)

1. A companion for the first dog.  It's left at home during the day all alone and it could use some to keep it company.
2.  The dog will get more exercise.  Because lets face it: even with all the great exercise we're getting from walking the dogs just need more exercise.  And if the dog had a companion for the yard or the dog park they would get way more exercise.
3. Socialization. No matter how often you take a dog to the park, to daycare, to play groups, the socialization they receive will not be as complete as the socialization they will get from living with another dog.  This will help them out in all aspects of their life.
4. Instincts.  Dogs are pack animals, meaning that their instincts tell them to live among a group.  And while they can consider humans their group, they have been shown to feel more at ease with another canine in their "pack."
5. For the non-canine's sake.  As someone who has a cat that is the scapegoat to the dog let me tell you that all dogs should have a doggy friend just to keep the cats, birds, reptiles, bunnies, and any other animals in or around the house from deciding to move into one person's room and live out their days in there.
6. Because everyone needs a friend.  Even dogs, we as people think our lives can be bad, imagine living in a house where you stared at everyone's ankles all day and no one even understood you.
7.  Supporting a local shelter.  In fact, often times you can support the shelter you got your first dog from.  It's like saying "thanks for all the great times we've had with this one, we'll take another off your hands to let you know how happy we are with the first!"
8. Money.  Yes, dogs can be kind of expensive, but you know what's super fun discounts! And you know what lots of places give?  Second dog discounts!  So those vet bills for when you have to take your dog to get their shots will be super cheap because congratuwelldone you've got two dogs and now you're basically just rolling in free stuff!
9. Buying in bulk.  Here's the thing about dog food, they sell it in gigantic fifty pound bags by my little dog won't eat all that food before it's gotten stale, but when you have multiple dogs they will, so now you're just saving money all over the place! And if you belong to a place like Sam's Club you can get it even cheaper because you are a savvy shopper who has their life on the right track.

Books that Changed my Life

I've read too many books to count, and though I can usually recall a general plot summary after seeing the cover, there are a few books that have changed my life and that have stayed with me to be read and reread until they were dog-eared, food-stained, water-damaged, and all out destroyed.  For some I know why I latched on and still have yet to let go, for others it is undetermined.

The first book I found that made a significant impact on my life was The Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane by Kate DiCamillo.  The story is of a porcelain rabbit who is loved deeply but is too vain to love anyone but himself, until he goes on an unfortunate journey that shows him the tragedy of life and teaches him compassion.  When I read this book at age eight it was the first book I ever cried while reading.  I was angry at the author for the anguish she put the characters through, up until that point the saddest books I had read were the Boxcar Children -- and I purposely avoided the first book because it made me sad.  However Edward Tulane left me with a sense of knowledge, of deeper meaning, and I spent days thinking about the book.  Finally I read it again, unsatisfied with the conclusions I had come to and thinking there must have been something I had missed.  Each time I read it I find new meaning, but it always ends the same.

Rules by Cynthia Lord first left me feeling unsure of myself, and even now it makes my faith in "finding cures" for illnesses that can't be treated with a pill sink a little lower.  Yet I find myself drawn myself back to the book narrated by the older sister of a boy with severe autism.  As a young child with an adjustment disorder and a three-year old sister who wouldn't speak a word this book simultaneously served to show me how lucky I was and how much trouble I was in for in the future.  I wasn't as bad off as the autistic kid in the book, it wasn't that my sister couldn't talk, she just didn't want to.  However I was also in or a life of therapy appointments and medications and odd looks for weird behaviors.  All in all the ending was just as disheartening as the rest of the book, and yet I returned to the book over and over, perhaps looking for clues that I had missed the glimmer of hope for the autistic, and for me.

F. Scott Fitzgerald has always spoken to me, but The Great Gatsby is one book that I have read multiple times and always found new connotations and ways to think about things.  I must admit that when I first read it I hated the book with a passion, and was not happy to be reading Gossip Girl: Roaring Twenties.  However, after having read the entire thing and reflecting on Fitzgerald's true meaning I realized that I had read the book at face value, and had failed to read on the metaphorical level.  When reading again I picked up on the socioeconomic commentary and found it to have an incredible message about the consumerism that plagued society, which is very relevant in today's society.  I fell in love with the irony of a book written about "empty parties" which were mocking the lifestyles of the affluent, which people copied by having those exact same parties.  Reading and rereading I find more and more comments on the human status, and the lifestyles that were all too prominent then and are again.

While there are many more that could be added to the list, these are three very prominent ones.