Reasons You Should Be Listening To "Welcome To Night Vale"

Welcome To Night Vale is a deadpan horror/comedy podcast that is produced bi-monthly for it's many listeners.  It is set in Night Vale "a small desert town where the sun is hot, the moon is beautiful, and mysterious lights pass over the the town while the citizens pretend to sleep."  Now it is time for you to ask yourself: why am I not listening to "Welcome to Night Vale?"

1. Cecil Gershwin Palmer the radio announcer who will speak in his low, smooth radio voice.  Except when it comes to Carlos the Scientist.  And cats on the Internet and floating in the radio station bathroom about four feet off the ground.

2.  Oh, did we mention Carlos the Scientist?  We did, didn't we?  Well as the Vague, Yet Menacing Government Agency we must tell you that it is all okay.  As Cecil has said, Carlos the scientist has perfect hair, and is, in fact, a scientist.

3.  We should probably get back to the floating bathroom cat.  That's Khoshekh.  He's just a cat.  Nothing to see here.

4. Big Rico's Pizza.  It's a government mandate.  Everybody's loves government-mandated wheat and wheat-by product free pizza.


5.  The Public Library.  Ironically the biography section only has biographies of one person and there are no entrances or exits, meaning it is more of an unwilling abduction to go in or out.  Also you will probably die.

6.  The NRA.  Always changing it's slogan, some of them include: "Guns don't kill people, people kill guns" and "guns don't kill people, it's impossible to be killed by a gun, we're all invincible to bullets and it's a miracle."

7.  The Private Library.  Only available to one person, the town billionaire, who uses it solely for walking around nude and not reading a single book.

8.  Tamika Flynn.  Leader of the insurgent children, she's actually pretty terrifying.  She is taking on StrexCorp.

9.  Oh yeah, StrexCorp.  They're pretty awful.  They just showed up and started buying stuff.  Like, everything.  Pretty much the whole town.

10.  The Glow Cloud.  "All hail the glow cloud."

11.  The Auction.  Once a year the whole city auctions things, restaurant vouchers, radio announcers, the usual.

12.  Interns.  They never survive long but we kind of like them, and their inevitable doom.

13.  The Dog Park.  Full of hooded figures, doesn't allow dogs.  Holding intern Dana hostage.

14.  A super-cute relationship between Carlos and Cecil.  That is all.